Is there really hope in the world?

This day is so... effing annoying. I'll just type and type until everything in my head is let out.

I just don't get it. I know I don't have enough of a reason to be like this.

I had a feeling this would and now I think I it is happening already.

Just the thought of her, makes it even more painful to think that it maybe true that I'm not really that kind of a guy. The guy that could be with her. The guy that can make her happy. It just doesn't even add up. I don't want to think of it anymore.

I just feel forgotten. I just feel that she doesn't even notice me. I feel that she doesn't even care.

Its just that it can never happen the way i thought it would. Its just so hard to think right now.

I don't want to feel like this anymore but it is like an arrow ,no not an arrow, a spear pierced through my heart then go through my back.

I feel betrayed. I feel weak. I feel hopeless.

Its just that everything about her is just perfect. I can't even go a second not thinking of her.

I want to keep putting all my feelings in this post yet at the same time letting out in a scream.

If you would ever read this don't get me wrong its just the feeling I am now. I still don't know if it is really like this. I don't know anymore. I want to vent all this tomorrow during PE or in Basketball. I just need to hit something. I just want something to happen this week, soemthing happy.

I think you won;t even understand anything I wrote here. Even I didn't get anything I wrote.